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The Green Shirt

Posted by Mummy Dearest on Sep-15-2005

Today I found the green shirt. Within seconds of locating the despised object, I had drop- kicked it into the washing machine and smiled. It was one of the most personally satisfying things that I have done for a very long time. Next, I’ll find that black shirt, and shall be in heaven, I know.

You see, the green shirt and the black shirt have become symbols of the trite nature of the things pissing me off about The Girl. They are both newish shirts of hers, one bought before school started, one about three weeks ago. She wears them all. of. the. time. No problem, but they. have. never. been. washed.

Like many mummies in Europe ( where one grows old waiting for the washing machine to finish one, teeny, weeny load), I do laundry every day. I don’t complain about it, don’t mind it, here, give me your soiled garments, no problem. But those two tops have never crossed the thresh hold of the laundry room, a mere three meters from The Girl’s room.

And they…well, they stink. I double checked the green one today. Yew- wee.

Last week- in an attempt to solve the laundry problem residing in The Girl’s habitat- I decided that I would no longer allow her to leave the house in soiled clothing, in smelly threads.

Each and every school morning last week- at a few minutes before 7, when I have finished cleaning up the cat piss and am just about to have my first sip of coffee- she appeared in either the green or black shirt. And each and every morning last week, I sent her back upstairs to change her clothes. And each and every morning, she rolled her eyes about in her head, made exasperated sounds and stomp- stomp- stomped her way up to the third floor. And then back down again.

All before my first sip of coffee.

I am pleased with my new attitude, to rid myself of tedious irritants.

And over joyed that I found that green shirt.

Now to find the black one.

You know, that one she wore today….

  1. deneen Said,

    I have this battle all the time. I have no words of wisdom to offer. I just repeat this mantra “this too shall pass-this too shall pass”. I also just go ahead and do it myself at times to avoid the inevitable confrontation. I am pretty sure I need a vacation at this point though-I have earned it. In the meantime, I have taken up the “beer a day” coping plan. Best of luck to you!

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