Did I spell that right ?

I am here alone. I cannot go out in public. My family thinks that I am drunk, but I am not. But I cannot speak. I kid you not. If I try to talk, I stutter, I stammer, I cry. But mostly, I cannot say two words within one minute. I a’m so cold. I should order something warm for myself to eat, but I am afraid that I will not be able to speak. Plus, I am not really hungry, I am just so fucking cold.

I cannot get the TV here to work. I am really working on back up here. My resources are very limited.

I know how lucky we were, how blessed. Really.

But, on that lower level, I am so cold and I can not speak. Fine. I will order myself something warm to eat. What I really want is comfort food, I want Velveta macaroni and cheese. Or a good bean soup. Well, I can dream. This is a very nice hotel, but the food, well, after one day you have been there, done that and I promised the father that I would not leave the hotel. I am very weird right now. You cannot begin to imagine how I stutter.

One day, this will all be very funny.

In the fire, or because of the fire, all of my books are history.

This is where we go to those different levels of disasters- the threat of nuclear war always tops the pops.  Then we move into the everyone got out safely level. And then, the photos.

And last on the list are my books.

They are all gone. And they are last on the list to replace, and we have- so I have heard- great insurance.

You know how it is, Mummy Martyr.

All of my books are gone.

A fire. In Brabant.

December 28th must have been a very quiet night in Brabant.

Because of a very long and boring story, within 20 minutes we knew there was a fire.  The Father and I tried to put it out, but within a minute, we saw that it was hopeless.

We all reacted well, except I told the girl to call 911.And bring a bucket upstairs. The bucket worked, although I found one in the girl”s bathroom and had already filled it up. But The Father and I saw immediately that we had to get out of the house. Now.

I got the girls and the dogs out, then I sent the girls in to get shoes and coats. I grabbed my lap top- it was there, in the kitchen, but I forgot my shoes and that recharger thing for the laptop. The Father finally came out of the house.

The wind worked for us.

We sat across the street from our house this morning, and an insurance guy said that because of the water and smoke damage the contents of our home would be considered 90% lost.  I do not in particular want to think about this. My books are all toast. Nope. This is fine. Our glass is half full, we were so lucky. Our girls did not die.

We are the Golden Tulip Eight now, in Den Bosch, next to C and A.

If push comes to shove, what saved us, was my PC and my 1`TG external. We moved it  up to the attic a few hours before the fire broke out in the laundry room, same floor. So everybody could play on the Sims 3.  I had the space for the Sims. So we were checking that sucker every 15 minutes.

I lost my external. It is toast. I kept all of my back ups on that. But I have another backup, maybe I can get my crap back, genealogy, photos.

But as I told every one last night- or was it the night before … our glass is half full.